Verse
A
The holidays were upon us
D
And things were going fine
A
Til the day I heard the doorbell
B . E
And a chill ran up my spine
A
I grabbed the wife and children
D
As the postman wheeled it in
A
B yearly Christmas nightmare
B . E
Has just come back again
[Chorus]
A
It was harder than the head of Uncle Bucky
D
Heavy as a sermon of Preacher Lucky
A
One's enough to get the whole state of
B . E
Kentucky a great big belly ache
A
It was denser than a trove of barnyard turkeys
D
Tougher than a truckload of all beef jerky
A
Drier than a drought in Albuquerque
B E
Grandma's killer fruitcake
[Verse]
A
Now, I had to swallow some marginal fare
D
At our famiy feast
A
I even downed Aunt Possum Pie
B . E
Just to keep the family peace
A
I winced at Wilma's Gizzard Mousse
D
But said it tasted fine
A
But, that lethal weapon Grandma baked
B . E
Is where I drawn the line
[Chorus]
A
It was harder than the head of Uncle Bucky
D
Heavy as a sermon of Preacher Lucky
A
One's enough to get the whole state of
B . E
Kentucky a great big belly ache
A
It was denser than a trove of barnyard turkeys
D
Tougher than a truckload of all beef jerky
A
Drier than a drought in Albuquerque
B E
Grandma's killer fruitcakE
[Outro]
A D
It's early Christmas Morning The phone rings us awake
A B . E
It's granma pa she wants to know How'd we like her cake
A . D
Well grandma, I nevcer, Uh we couldn't, It was unbeliveable thats for shure
A B E
What's that you say, Oh no grandma, Puh-leez don't send us more.
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