Verse
G C
My baby don't want fancy things. No diamonds, furs, or limousines
G D
She just wants my lovin all the time.
G C
When I'm at work, she still wants more, there is one thing she's beggin for
G D G
to fill the void when I'm not by her side.
Chorus
C G
A multi function jumbo dong, waterproof 12 inches long
A7 D
with a G spot stimulator and a suction cup to attach to the table
C G
Vibroshaft, rotating beads, cyberskin with 7 speeds
A7 G
the Cadillac of hand held rubber wangs.
Verse 2:
G C
So i went down to the sex boutique, to find the toy that's so unique
G D
That takes my place when I'm not by her side.
G C
And there I found much to my shock, her lifelike toy was out of stock
G D G
So I asked the clerk to show me what he had.
Chorus 2:
C G
he had remote controlled vibrating thongs, mulitcolored double dongs
A7 D
A g spot stimulator that kind of looked like a miner's helmet
C G
A backdoor buddy, a latex fist, that's right I said a latex fist
A7 G
and a rack of 4 inch weiners, marked half off.
Verse 3:
G C
And there it was, it caught my eye, behind the fist and spanish fly
G D
It was the one she wanted all along
G C
I drove back down to her place and found my best friend on her face
G D G
I shoved that latex toy where the sun don't shine.
Chorus
C G
It was a multi function jumbo dong, waterproof 12 inches long
A7 D
with a G spot stimulator and a suction cup to attach to the table
C G
Vibroshaft, rotating beads, cyberskin with 7 speeds
A7 D
that SOB will never be the same
C G
He won't forget this love affair. That toy's still in his derriere
A7 G
And now I wish I'd bought that latex fist.