Verse
E
Royals on the first page, swine flu and road rage
Find Maddie, foreign baddie, put him in a big cage
A
Bureaucratic red tape, Facebook gang rape
E
Gordon out, Dave in, before the country caves in
B A E
Ian Huntley gets his own Jacuzzi and a gym in jail
B A E
It's absolutely true because I read it in the Daily Mail
[Verse 2]
E
Bring back capital punishment for pedophiles
Photo feature on schoolgirl skirt styles
A
Binge Britain, single mums, pensioners, hoodie scum
E
Oversexed and underaged, foreign stories half a page
B A E
Criminals get Marks & Spencer vouchers when released on bail
B A E
It's absolutely true because I read it in the Daily Mail
[Verse 3]
E
Ban this gay smut, I'm not racist but
Car crime, knife crime, hang-the-cheating-wife time
A
Pop stars take drugs, teen boys wear hoods
E
Sports stars have sex, bears shit in woods
B A E
Brussels politicians want to stop us drinking English ale
B A E
It's absolutely true because I read it in the Daily Mail
[Verse 4]
E
Climategate, petrol prices, potholes, credit crisis
Gypsies, Russell Brand, time we all took a stand
A
Modern art, where to start? Trash the lot of it
E
Apart from statuette of puppy, 50 quid plus P&P
B A E
Muslim women hiding stolen goods behind their veil
B A E
It's absolutely true because I read it in the Daily Mail
[Verse 5]
E
Poles paid to give blood, immigration like a flood
Soft touch British Isles, cancer from your mobiles
A
Cancer from your laptop, cancer from your root crop
B E
Cancer from your shoes, from your dog, from your pen top
B A C#m
Immigrants arriving on an unprecedented scale
B A E
It's absolutely true because I read it in the Daily Mail
B A E
They never mince their words in the good ol' Daily Mail
B A E
It's absolutely true Because I gather all my views From the Daily Mail