Verse
C#m A B
Dear Slim, I wrote you, but you still ain't callin
E B C#m
I left my cell, my pager, and my home phone at the bottom
A B
I sent two letters back in Autumn, you must not have got 'em
E B
There probably was a problem with the post office or somethin'
C#m A B
Sometimes I scribble addresses too sloppy when I jot 'em
E B C#m
But anyway, what's been up man, how's your daughter?
A
My girlfriend's pregnant too, I'm bout to be a father
B A
If I have a daughter, guess what I'm a call her
C#m
I'm a name her Bonnie
A
I read about your Uncle Ronnie too, I'm sorry
B E B C#m
A B
I know you probably hear this every day, but I'm your biggest fan
E B C#m
A B
I got a room full of your posters and your pictures man
E B C#m
A
Anyways, I hope you get this man, hit me back
B A
Just to chat, truly yours, your biggest fan, this is Stan
[Chorus]
C#m A B
My tea's gone cold, I'm wonderin' why
E B C#m
Got out of bed at all
A B
The morning rain clouds up my window
E B C#m
And I can't see at all
A B
And even if I could it'll all be gray
E B C#m
But your picture on my wall
A B
It reminds me that it's not so bad
E B C#m
It's not so bad
[Verse 2]
C#m A
Dear Slim, you still ain't called or wrote, I hope you have a chance,
B E C#m
A
If you didn't wanna talk to me outside your concert
B E B
You didn't have to, but you could've signed an autograph for Matthew
C#m A
That's my little brother man, he's only six years old
B
We waited in the blistering cold for you
E B C#m
For four hours and you just said no
A
B A C#m
He wants to be just like you man, he likes you more than I do
A
I ain't that mad though, I just don't like being lied to
B E B
Remember when we met in Denver, you said if I write you
C#m A
You would write back, see I'm just like you in a way
B
I never knew my father neither
E B C#m
He used to always cheat on my mom and beat her
A
I can relate to what you're saying in your songs
B E B
C#m A
B A
I even got a tattoo of your name across the chest
C#m A
Sometimes I even cut myself to see how much it bleeds
B E B
Its like adrenaline, the pain is such a sudden rush for me
C#m A
See everthing you say is real, and I respect you cause you tell it
B E B
My girlfriend's jealous, because I talk about you 24/7
C#m A
But she don't know you like I know you slim, no one does
B E B
She don't know what it was like for people like us growin' up
C#m A
You gotta call me man, I'll be the biggest fan you'll ever lose
B
Sincerely yours, Stan, p.s.
A
We should be together too
[Chorus]
C#m A B
My tea's gone cold, I'm wonderin' why
E B C#m
Got out of bed at all
A B
The morning rain clouds up my window
E B C#m
And I can't see at all
A B
And even if I could it'll all be gray
E B C#m
But your picture on my wall
A B
It reminds me that it's not so bad
A
It's not so bad
[Verse 3]
C#m A B
Dear Mr I'm-Too-Good-To-Call-Or-Write-My-Fans
E B
This'll be the last package I ever send your a**
C#m
It's been six months and still no words
A
I don't deserve it
B
I know you got my last two letters
E B
I wrote the addresses on them perfect
C#m A
So this is my cassette I'm sending you, I hope you hear it
B E B
I'm in the car right now, I'm doin' 90 on the freeway
C#m A B
Hey Slim, I drank a fifth of vodka, dare me to drive?
A
You know that song by Phil Collins, In the Air of the Night
C#m A
About that guy who could've saved that other guy from drowning
B E B
But didn't, but Phil saw it all, then at a show he found him
C#m A
That's kinda how this is, you could've rescued me from drowning
B E B
Now it's too late, I'm on a 1,000 downers now, I'm drowsy
C#m A
And all I wanted was a lousy letter or a call
B E B
I hope you know I ripped all of your pictures off my wall
C#m A B
I love you Slim, we could've been together, think about it
A C#m
You ruined it now, I hope you can't sleep and you dream about it
A
And when you dream, I hope you can't sleep and you scream about it
B E B C#m
I hope your conscience eats at you and you can't breathe without me
A
B E B
Hey Slim, that's my girlfriend screamin' in the trunk
C#m A
But I didn't slit her throat, I just tied her up, see I ain't like you
B E B C#m
Cause if she suffocates, she'll suffer more, then she'll die too
A B
Well, gotta go, I'm almost under the bridge now
A
[Instrumental] x2
C#m A B A
[Chorus]
C#m A B
My tea's gone cold, I'm wonderin' why
E B C#m
Got out of bed at all
A B
The morning rain clouds up my window
E B C#m
And I can't see at all
A B
And even if I could it'll all be gray
E B C#m
But your picture on my wall
A B
It reminds me that it's not so bad
A
It's not so bad
[Verse 4]
C#m A
Dear Stan, I meant to write you sooner, but I've just been busy
B E B
You say your girlfriend's pregnant now, how far along is she?
C#m A
Look, I'm really flattered you would call your daughter that
B
And here's an autograph for your brother
E B C#m
I wrote it on this Starter cap
A
I'm sorry I didn't see you at the show, I must've missed you
B E B C#m
A B
B
C#m
A
You got some issues, Stan, I think you need some counseling
B E B C#m
To keep your a** from bouncin' off the walls when you get down some
A
B E B C#m
A
I really think you and your girlfriend need each other
B E
Or maybe you just need to treat her better
B C#m A
I hope you get to read this letter, I hope it reaches you in time
B A
Before you hurt yourself, I think that you'll be doin just fine
C#m A
If you relax a little, I'm glad that I inspire you, but Stan
B E B C#m
Why are you so mad? Try to understand, that I do want you as a fan
A
B E B C#m
A
Some dude was drunk and drove his car over a bridge
B E B
And had his girlfriend in his trunk and she was pregnant with his kid
C#m A
And in the car they found a tape, didn't say who it was to
B A C#m
Come to think about it, his name was, it was you...
[Ending]
C#m
Damn