Verse
D#m B C#
Dear Slim, I wrote you, but you still ain't callin
F# C# D#m
I left my cell, my pager, and my home phone at the bottom
B C#
I sent two letters back in Autumn, you must not have got 'em
F# C#
There probably was a problem with the post office or somethin'
D#m B C#
Sometimes I scribble addresses too sloppy when I jot 'em
F# C# D#m
But anyway, what's been up man, how's your daughter?
B
My girlfriend's pregnant too, I'm bout to be a father
C# B
If I have a daughter, guess what I'm a call her
D#m
I'm a name her Bonnie
B
I read about your Uncle Ronnie too, I'm sorry
C# F# C# D#m
B C#
I know you probably hear this every day, but I'm your biggest fan
F# C# D#m
B C#
I got a room full of your posters and your pictures man
F# C# D#m
B
Anyways, I hope you get this man, hit me back
C# B
Just to chat, truly yours, your biggest fan, this is Stan
[Chorus]
D#m B C#
My tea's gone cold, I'm wonderin' why
F# C# D#m
Got out of bed at all
B C#
The morning rain clouds up my window
F# C# D#m
And I can't see at all
B C#
And even if I could it'll all be gray
F# C# D#m
But your picture on my wall
B C#
It reminds me that it's not so bad
F# C# D#m
It's not so bad
[Verse 2]
D#m B
Dear Slim, you still ain't called or wrote, I hope you have a chance,
C# F# D#m
B
If you didn't wanna talk to me outside your concert
C# F# C#
You didn't have to, but you could've signed an autograph for Matthew
D#m B
That's my little brother man, he's only six years old
C#
We waited in the blistering cold for you
F# C# D#m
For four hours and you just said no
B
C# B D#m
He wants to be just like you man, he likes you more than I do
B
I ain't that mad though, I just don't like being lied to
C# F# C#
Remember when we met in Denver, you said if I write you
D#m B
You would write back, see I'm just like you in a way
C#
I never knew my father neither
F# C# D#m
He used to always cheat on my mom and beat her
B
I can relate to what you're saying in your songs
C# F# C#
D#m B
C# B
I even got a tattoo of your name across the chest
D#m B
Sometimes I even cut myself to see how much it bleeds
C# F# C#
Its like adrenaline, the pain is such a sudden rush for me
D#m B
See everthing you say is real, and I respect you cause you tell it
C# F# C#
My girlfriend's jealous, because I talk about you 24/7
D#m B
But she don't know you like I know you slim, no one does
C# F# C#
She don't know what it was like for people like us growin' up
D#m B
You gotta call me man, I'll be the biggest fan you'll ever lose
C#
Sincerely yours, Stan, p.s.
B
We should be together too
[Chorus]
D#m B C#
My tea's gone cold, I'm wonderin' why
F# C# D#m
Got out of bed at all
B C#
The morning rain clouds up my window
F# C# D#m
And I can't see at all
B C#
And even if I could it'll all be gray
F# C# D#m
But your picture on my wall
B C#
It reminds me that it's not so bad
B
It's not so bad
[Verse 3]
D#m B C#
Dear Mr I'm-Too-Good-To-Call-Or-Write-My-Fans
F# C#
This'll be the last package I ever send your a**
D#m
It's been six months and still no words
B
I don't deserve it
C#
I know you got my last two letters
F# C#
I wrote the addresses on them perfect
D#m B
So this is my cassette I'm sending you, I hope you hear it
C# F# C#
I'm in the car right now, I'm doin' 90 on the freeway
D#m B C#
Hey Slim, I drank a fifth of vodka, dare me to drive?
B
You know that song by Phil Collins, In the Air of the Night
D#m B
About that guy who could've saved that other guy from drowning
C# F# C#
But didn't, but Phil saw it all, then at a show he found him
D#m B
That's kinda how this is, you could've rescued me from drowning
C# F# C#
Now it's too late, I'm on a 1,000 downers now, I'm drowsy
D#m B
And all I wanted was a lousy letter or a call
C# F# C#
I hope you know I ripped all of your pictures off my wall
D#m B C#
I love you Slim, we could've been together, think about it
B D#m
You ruined it now, I hope you can't sleep and you dream about it
B
And when you dream, I hope you can't sleep and you scream about it
C# F# C# D#m
I hope your conscience eats at you and you can't breathe without me
B
C# F# C#
Hey Slim, that's my girlfriend screamin' in the trunk
D#m B
But I didn't slit her throat, I just tied her up, see I ain't like you
C# F# C# D#m
Cause if she suffocates, she'll suffer more, then she'll die too
B C#
Well, gotta go, I'm almost under the bridge now
B
[Instrumental] x2
D#m B C# B
[Chorus]
D#m B C#
My tea's gone cold, I'm wonderin' why
F# C# D#m
Got out of bed at all
B C#
The morning rain clouds up my window
F# C# D#m
And I can't see at all
B C#
And even if I could it'll all be gray
F# C# D#m
But your picture on my wall
B C#
It reminds me that it's not so bad
B
It's not so bad
[Verse 4]
D#m B
Dear Stan, I meant to write you sooner, but I've just been busy
C# F# C#
You say your girlfriend's pregnant now, how far along is she?
D#m B
Look, I'm really flattered you would call your daughter that
C#
And here's an autograph for your brother
F# C# D#m
I wrote it on this Starter cap
B
I'm sorry I didn't see you at the show, I must've missed you
C# F# C# D#m
B C#
C#
D#m
B
You got some issues, Stan, I think you need some counseling
C# F# C# D#m
To keep your a** from bouncin' off the walls when you get down some
B
C# F# C# D#m
B
I really think you and your girlfriend need each other
C# F#
Or maybe you just need to treat her better
C# D#m B
I hope you get to read this letter, I hope it reaches you in time
C# B
Before you hurt yourself, I think that you'll be doin just fine
D#m B
If you relax a little, I'm glad that I inspire you, but Stan
C# F# C# D#m
Why are you so mad? Try to understand, that I do want you as a fan
B
C# F# C# D#m
B
Some dude was drunk and drove his car over a bridge
C# F# C#
And had his girlfriend in his trunk and she was pregnant with his kid
D#m B
And in the car they found a tape, didn't say who it was to
C# B D#m
Come to think about it, his name was, it was you...
[Ending]
D#m
Damn