Intro
D# F# A# Gm
[Verse 1]
D# F# A#
I'm totally confused
Gm
By you
D# F# A#
I'm totally confused
Gm
By you
D# F# A#
Theres a ten foot man
Gm
Making my lunch
D# F# A#
I'll never understand
Gm F
I want you so much
[Chorus]
D# A# A
And I never, ever want it
D# A# A
And I never, ever want it
D# A# A
And I never, ever want it
D# A# A
And I never, ever want it
D# F# A# Gm
[Verse 2]
D# F# A#
I'm totally confused
Gm
By you
D# F# A#
I'm totally confused
Gm
By you
D# F# A#
Whisper in my face
Gm
Scream in my ear
D# F# A#
Pack me in a suitcase
Gm
With the can of beer
[Chorus]
D# A# A
And I never, ever want it
D# A# A
And I never, ever want it
D# A# A
And I never, ever want it
D# A# A
And I never, ever want it
D# F# A# Gm
6. Piece Of Shit
[Intro]
F Gm C F Dm Gm C A# x2
[Chorus]
F Gm
I called my baby a piece of shit
C F
She hated it, I hated it
Dm Gm C A#
Funny thing is now we both feel fine
F Gm
She let go and I caught it
C F
I hated it, She hated it
Dm Gm C A# F Gm
Hope it doesn't happen all the time
[Verse 1]
C Gm
Ripping up the carpet tiles
C Gm
Greeted by a lonely smile
C A#
And the foundations seemed so solid
Gm C
By the roof was always leaking, woo-hoo-hoo!
F Gm C F Dm Gm C A# x2
[Verse 2]
F Gm
If you call my name I'll come strolling
C F
Because I've fallen in the flame
Gm
If you think I'm all that you want
C F Gm C
The restaurant is booked in your name
[Chorus]
F Gm
I called my baby a piece of shit
C F
She hated it, I hated it
Dm Gm C A#
Funny thing is now we both feel fine
F Gm
She let go and I caught it
C F
I hated it, She hated it
Dm Gm C A# F Gm F
Hope it doesn't happen all the time
7. Pinball Lez
[Intro]
C D#
G Bm F#m C
G Bm F#m C G
[Verse 1]
Bm F#m
Pinball Lez is shacked up
C G D G
With Nan's girlfriend
Bm F#m
Reconditioning pinballs
C G
He farms them out again
[Verse 2]
Bm F#m
The word on the street is suggesting
C G D G
Things aren't so great
Bm F#m
At the St. Lucia residence
C G
Things are pretty quiet at night
[Chorus]
C
And no-one seems to be
D# G
Answering the phone
C D
Oh Lez come home (Leslie!)
G
The pinballs need you
C D
Oh Lez come home (Leslie!)
G
I promise the school-kids won't tease you
C D
Oh Lez come home (Leslie!)
G
The cops will understand everything
C D
Oh Lez come home (Leslie!)
F F#m G Bm F#m C G
The casinos are rigged to beat you
Bm F#m C G
[Verse 3]
Bm F#m
Lez has given up
C G
He's moving out to Stanthorpe
Bm F#m
Swidden agriculture
C G
Things are pretty quiet at night
[Chorus]
C D# C
Out in the fields today
D#
No-one seems to be
G
Answering the phone
C D
Oh Lez come home (Leslie!)
G
The pinballs need you
C D
Oh Lez come home (Leslie!)
G
I promise the school-kids won't tease you
C D
Oh Lez come home (Leslie!)
G
The cops will understand everything
C D
Oh Lez come home (Leslie!)
F F#m G Bm F#m C G
The casinos are rigged to beat you
8. Sons And Daughters
[Verse 1]
A# F G# D#
If I could read their writing I would let you know
A# F G# D#
All about their records and the places they go
F G# D# Gm
I don't get it but I see it in the sun
G# D# A# F C
And the aerosols they use are never captured by security
[Verse 2]
A# F G# D#
Cameras talking and the lenses are walking
A# F G# D#
All of it's funky just to let me know
[Chorus]
F
I don't get it (I don't get it)
G#
But I get it (I don't get it)
D# G
From the sons and daughters
G# D# A# F C
We spent all of our money on groceries from Seessel's
[Bridge]
C# G# C#
I fell asleep in the morning light
G# C#
I fell asleep in the very first light
G# C#
And as the day had just begun
A#m C# G#
With you lying in the sun
C# G# C#
Lying in the very last sun
C# G# C#
Lying in the sun
G# C#
Lying in the very last sun
[Verse 3]
A# F G# D#
If I could read their writing I would let you know
A# F G# D#
Progress from colouring to outlining to piecing on their own
F G# D# G
I like you because you are just the right height
A# G#
If I could read their writing I would let you know
9. Nice Bird
[Intro]
D# G F#
D# G F#
[Verse 1]
D# G F#
I've got a nice bird
D# G F#
I've got a nice bird
Fm Cm Fm Cm
I understand that a bird in my hand
G# G
Is worth two in the bush
Fm Cm Fm Cm G#
Understand that the bird is the word that I use
G F#
To describe you
[Chorus]
D# G F#
I've got a nice bird
D# G F#
I've got a nice bird
D# G F#
I've got a nice bird
[Verse 2]
Fm Cm Fm Cm
This world divides into people who think
G# G
There are two kinds of folks and those who don't
Fm Cm Fm Cm
Trey's got the feathers and a 12-gauge shotgun
G# G D# C# X 2
Volkswagens from the Reich!
[Chorus]
D# G F#
I've got a nice bird
D# G F#
I've got a nice bird
[Bridge]
A#m D# G#
There's a stretch of road out past The Gap
C# F#
Where they're taking some snaps, stick to the music champ
The words are important
C7 D# C# X 4
The words are important!
[Chorus]
D# Gm F#
I've got a nice bird
D# Gm F#
I've got a nice bird X 5
[Outro]
F F
N.I.C.E.B.I.R.D. bird
10. No Rock And Roll Record
[Verse 1]
A# F A# F
No rock'n'roll singer is going to sing my song
Dm C D#
Same stupid words going over and over
A# F A# F
The drop-out turned out trashing my sound
Dm C D#
Rub the lines off the back of my hands
[Chorus]
F
I cut my teeth on the end of my bed
C
I never ever sang in a high school band
F C Dm
Somehow you would think I would have figured it out by now
D#
By now
[Verse 2]
A# F A# F
No rock'n'roll record made no difference to me
Dm C D#
No seven inch, twelve inch, cassette, G#D
A# F A# F
Not wasting my time on a dumb pop song
Dm C D#
Cut my hair going back to my bank job
[Chorus]
F
The radio could have been kinder to me
C
But I never looked good on a colour TV
F C Dm
Somehow you would think I would have figured it out by now
D#
By now
A# F A# F Dm C D# x2
[Bridge]
G# C C# D#
I've got a message from the other side
G# C C#
It came to me last night in semaphore
D# F
But I can't play the minor chords
[Verse 3]
A# F A# F
No rock'n'roll record made no difference to me
Dm C D#
No seven inch, twelve inch, cassette, G#D
A# F A# F
Not wasting my time on a dumb pop song
Dm C D#
Cut my hair going back to my bank job
11. Sinatra Theory
[Verse 1]
A# Gm
I walk these corridors
A# Gm
Don't think I'm ever coming home
A# Gm
One time to be your friend
A# Gm
I killed off everything you owned
Cm A# Gm
Losing the money was the hardest thing to own
[Chorus]
A# Gm
I'm coming home
[Verse 2]
A# Gm
I had some money once
A# Gm
I hear I spent it all on you
A# Gm
One time your Christmas lights
A# Gm
I threw my body on the lawn
Cm A# Gm
I'm smashing bugs with a ping-pong bat at home
[Chorus]
A# Gm
I'm coming home
A# Gm
My skeleton falls down
A# Gm
I'm coming home
[Bridge]
Gb C#
Community radio station rock gets played in the parking lots
G# D#m
These speakers amplify the tones
[Chorus]
A# Gm
I'm coming home
A# Gm
My skeleton falls down
A# Gm A#
I walk these corridors
12. Schtum
[Verse 1]
C#
I'm remaining schtum
I'm not going to speak out any more
D#m C#
I'm gonna be quiet, so quiet
D#m A#m
Almost silent like the flow
[Verse 2]
C#
Now that you are missing
I've called the searching off
D#m
I'll blame it on the light
C#
And I'm so tired
D#m A#m
We'll resume it at dawn
[Chorus]
D#m Gbm
Floating in the water
Gb C#
The floor is far below
[Verse 3]
D#m
I'm heading for Japan
C#
If I don't get snagged first
D#m A#m
As the water overflows
[Break]
C# D#m C# D#m A#m
Whistling bit
[Chorus]
D#m Gbm
Floating in the water
Gb C#
The floor is far below
[verse 4]
D#m
I'm heading for Japan
C#
If I don't get snagged first
D#m A#m C#
As the water overflows
13. The Truth About Drugs
[Verse 1]
G# D#
All the junkies are piling in their cars
A# A#m
And the kids can stay home from school
G# D#
Got the fire sticks, got the guns
C# D# C#
We got some CDs and and some tapes to tape them on
[Chorus]
G# D# C#
Seems the bitumen was made for me (made for me)
G# D# C#
And the lines in the middle too (middle too)
G# D#
Fnd they was travelling from A to G (F to B)
Fm D# G#
And I love only you
[Verse 2]
G# D# G# D#
We gotta stop at a chemist I know
C# D# Cm Fm
And that's the last of the car lighter
G# D# G# D#
I got a headache and my headache won't go
C# D# C Gb
Were only eating places truck drivers go
[Chorus]
G# D# C#
Seems the bitumen was made for me (made for me)
G# D# C#
And the lines in the middle too (middle too)
G# D#
Fnd they was travelling from A to G (F to B)
Fm D# G#
And I love only you
[Outro]
G# D# Fm D#
This is called the truth about drugs
G# D# Fm D#
(This is called the truth about drugs)
G# D# Fm D#
This is called the truth about drugs
G# D# Fm D# C#
(This is called the truth about drugs)
14. Music Is Crap
[Verse 1]
G# D# C# G#
Red eyes blue gaze, you look like hell today
D# C# G#
Step out on parade, you do it so well
D# C# G#
Your favourite shirt, those shoes that you bought in Perth
D# C# G#
Dumb Hair smart slacks, that's rock apparel
[Chorus]
C#
(Ahhhhhh)
G# C# G# C#
Music is crap aliens told me so
G# C# G# C#
Better than that, were gonna let you know
G# C# G# C#
Just listen up, become a receiver
G# C# D#
And then space out, when you're a believer
C#
That's what religion's for
G# C# G# C#
Music is crap
[Verse 2]
G# D# C# G#
Think of your friends, then put one on the door
D# C# G#
Everythings free, but were still poor
C# G#
Don't matter what you like, aliens hate it
C# D#
Rock, pop, metal, shop, they just berate it
C#
And I've found
D# C#
They dig the silence, hate the sound
D# C#
So pick up your telescopes, put your guitars down
D#
That's what I've found..
[Chorus]
G# C# G# C#
Music is crap aliens told me so
G# C# G# C#
Better than that, were gonna let you know
G# C# G# C#
Just listen up, become a receiver
G# C# D#
And then space out, when you're a believer
C#
That's what religion's for
G# C# G# C#
Music is crap
G# C# G# C#
Music is crap
G# C# G# C#
Music is crap
G# C# G# C#
Music is crap
15. The Drum
[Verse 1]
A# F A# F
After the show yeah we have to go
A D
You don't like it, I don't like it
A# F A# F
Write me a note about all of the folks
A D F
You have lied to, and you've sold to
[Chorus]
G G# D#
Has anybody seen my guitar and case
A E
'Cos it seems out of place
C G A
Won't you be so kind to find it?
G# D#
I had my amp there as well
A E
But I think that it fell
C G A
Left to the stage right behind it
We won't find it
[Verse 2]
A# F A# F
Just like the blow that went right to your head
A D
You don't show it. You don't show it
A# F A# F
Now off to the station we had to go
A E
You don't like it, no you don't like it
[Chorus]
G G# D#
Has anybody seen my guitar and case
A E
'Cos it seems out of place
C G A
Won't you be so kind to find it?
G# D#
I had my amp there as well
A E
But I think that it fell
C G A
Left to the stage right behind it
A
We won't find it
A
I don't like it
[Bridge]
D D#
Guitar and case, yeah!
G A# D
(Woah!)
D#
Not in its place, yaaargh!
G A# D
(Woah!)
D#
My amp's there as well!
G A# D
(Woah!)
D#
I think that it fell, yeah, yeah!
G A#
(Woah!)
[Verse 3]
A# F A# F
After the show yeah we have to go
A D
You don't like it, I don't like it
A# F A# F
Write me a note about all of the folks
A D F
You have lied to, and you've sold to
[Chorus]
G G# D#
Has anybody seen my guitar and case
A E
'Cos it seems out of place
C G A
Won't you be so kind to find it?
G# D#
I had my amp there as well
A E
But I think that it fell
C G A
Left to the stage right behind it
A
We won't find it
A
No you don't like it, like it, like it
[Outro]
D D#
Guitar and case, yeah!
G A# D
(Woah!)
D#
Not in its place, yaaargh!
G A# D
(Woah!)
D#
My amp's there as well!
G A# D
(Woah!)
D#
I think that it fell, yeah, yeah!
G A#
(Woah!)
G F
Off the stage, yeah
G A#
Off the stage, yeah
G F
Off the stage, yeah
G D
16. Eight Years Of Rock And Roll Has Completley Destroyed My Memory
[Verse 1]
F C Dm A#
I've got no memories
Am F
Oooh that's what I need
C Dm A#
I've got no past or yesterdays
Am Gm
Memories is what I need
Am F C A# C
But these memories are made for speed
[Verse 2]
F C Dm A#
I've forgot this morning
Am F
Forgot this evening too
C Dm A#
I'll have to beg your pardon
Am Gm
Your name starts with a Q
Am F C A#
Oh no it's something I've missed
C F A# F
My memory's missed
[Bridge]
A# F D#
I understand about your tan
A# F D#
So let me sleep tonight
A#
If there's a song in my throat
F D#
Guess it's something I ate
A# F D#
I guess must be throwing up
G# Fm
So kiss me
G# Fm
And make me believe
G# Fm
In ideologies
G# Fm
And the streets of sesame
F
Oh oh oh oh oh oh oh wah!
A#m Fm Gm D# Dm A#
[Verse 3]
F C Dm A#
I've got a good idea
Am F
To write my memories down
C Dm A#
Then I'll have nothing to fear
Am Gm
When mine lets me down
Am A
I'll find names and addresses on paper on the ground
A# F
I'm good with faces, no good with names
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