Intro
F G# C Am
[Verse 1]
F G# C
I'm totally confused
Am
By you
F G# C
I'm totally confused
Am
By you
F G# C
Theres a ten foot man
Am
Making my lunch
F G# C
I'll never understand
Am G
I want you so much
[Chorus]
F C B
And I never, ever want it
F C B
And I never, ever want it
F C B
And I never, ever want it
F C B
And I never, ever want it
F G# C Am
[Verse 2]
F G# C
I'm totally confused
Am
By you
F G# C
I'm totally confused
Am
By you
F G# C
Whisper in my face
Am
Scream in my ear
F G# C
Pack me in a suitcase
Am
With the can of beer
[Chorus]
F C B
And I never, ever want it
F C B
And I never, ever want it
F C B
And I never, ever want it
F C B
And I never, ever want it
F G# C Am
6. Piece Of Shit
[Intro]
G Am D G Em Am D C x2
[Chorus]
G Am
I called my baby a piece of shit
D G
She hated it, I hated it
Em Am D C
Funny thing is now we both feel fine
G Am
She let go and I caught it
D G
I hated it, She hated it
Em Am D C G Am
Hope it doesn't happen all the time
[Verse 1]
D Am
Ripping up the carpet tiles
D Am
Greeted by a lonely smile
D C
And the foundations seemed so solid
Am D
By the roof was always leaking, woo-hoo-hoo!
G Am D G Em Am D C x2
[Verse 2]
G Am
If you call my name I'll come strolling
D G
Because I've fallen in the flame
Am
If you think I'm all that you want
D G Am D
The restaurant is booked in your name
[Chorus]
G Am
I called my baby a piece of shit
D G
She hated it, I hated it
Em Am D C
Funny thing is now we both feel fine
G Am
She let go and I caught it
D G
I hated it, She hated it
Em Am D C G Am G
Hope it doesn't happen all the time
7. Pinball Lez
[Intro]
D F
A C#m G#m D
A C#m G#m D A
[Verse 1]
C#m G#m
Pinball Lez is shacked up
D A E A
With Nan's girlfriend
C#m G#m
Reconditioning pinballs
D A
He farms them out again
[Verse 2]
C#m G#m
The word on the street is suggesting
D A E A
Things aren't so great
C#m G#m
At the St. Lucia residence
D A
Things are pretty quiet at night
[Chorus]
D
And no-one seems to be
F A
Answering the phone
D E
Oh Lez come home (Leslie!)
A
The pinballs need you
D E
Oh Lez come home (Leslie!)
A
I promise the school-kids won't tease you
D E
Oh Lez come home (Leslie!)
A
The cops will understand everything
D E
Oh Lez come home (Leslie!)
G G#m A C#m G#m D A
The casinos are rigged to beat you
C#m G#m D A
[Verse 3]
C#m G#m
Lez has given up
D A
He's moving out to Stanthorpe
C#m G#m
Swidden agriculture
D A
Things are pretty quiet at night
[Chorus]
D F D
Out in the fields today
F
No-one seems to be
A
Answering the phone
D E
Oh Lez come home (Leslie!)
A
The pinballs need you
D E
Oh Lez come home (Leslie!)
A
I promise the school-kids won't tease you
D E
Oh Lez come home (Leslie!)
A
The cops will understand everything
D E
Oh Lez come home (Leslie!)
G G#m A C#m G#m D A
The casinos are rigged to beat you
8. Sons And Daughters
[Verse 1]
C G A# F
If I could read their writing I would let you know
C G A# F
All about their records and the places they go
G A# F Am
I don't get it but I see it in the sun
A# F C G D
And the aerosols they use are never captured by security
[Verse 2]
C G A# F
Cameras talking and the lenses are walking
C G A# F
All of it's funky just to let me know
[Chorus]
G
I don't get it (I don't get it)
A#
But I get it (I don't get it)
F A
From the sons and daughters
A# F C G D
We spent all of our money on groceries from Seessel's
[Bridge]
D# A# D#
I fell asleep in the morning light
A# D#
I fell asleep in the very first light
A# D#
And as the day had just begun
Cm D# A#
With you lying in the sun
D# A# D#
Lying in the very last sun
D# A# D#
Lying in the sun
A# D#
Lying in the very last sun
[Verse 3]
C G A# F
If I could read their writing I would let you know
C G A# F
Progress from colouring to outlining to piecing on their own
G A# F A
I like you because you are just the right height
C A#
If I could read their writing I would let you know
9. Nice Bird
[Intro]
F A G#
F A G#
[Verse 1]
F A G#
I've got a nice bird
F A G#
I've got a nice bird
Gm Dm Gm Dm
I understand that a bird in my hand
A# A
Is worth two in the bush
Gm Dm Gm Dm A#
Understand that the bird is the word that I use
A G#
To describe you
[Chorus]
F A G#
I've got a nice bird
F A G#
I've got a nice bird
F A G#
I've got a nice bird
[Verse 2]
Gm Dm Gm Dm
This world divides into people who think
A# A
There are two kinds of folks and those who don't
Gm Dm Gm Dm
Trey's got the feathers and a 12-gauge shotgun
A# A F D# X 2
Volkswagens from the Reich!
[Chorus]
F A G#
I've got a nice bird
F A G#
I've got a nice bird
[Bridge]
Cm F A#
There's a stretch of road out past The Gap
D# G#
Where they're taking some snaps, stick to the music champ
The words are important
D7 F D# X 4
The words are important!
[Chorus]
F Am G#
I've got a nice bird
F Am G#
I've got a nice bird X 5
[Outro]
G G
N.I.C.E.B.I.R.D. bird
10. No Rock And Roll Record
[Verse 1]
C G C G
No rock'n'roll singer is going to sing my song
Em D F
Same stupid words going over and over
C G C G
The drop-out turned out trashing my sound
Em D F
Rub the lines off the back of my hands
[Chorus]
G
I cut my teeth on the end of my bed
D
I never ever sang in a high school band
G D Em
Somehow you would think I would have figured it out by now
F
By now
[Verse 2]
C G C G
No rock'n'roll record made no difference to me
Em D F
No seven inch, twelve inch, cassette, A#D
C G C G
Not wasting my time on a dumb pop song
Em D F
Cut my hair going back to my bank job
[Chorus]
G
The radio could have been kinder to me
D
But I never looked good on a colour TV
G D Em
Somehow you would think I would have figured it out by now
F
By now
C G C G Em D F x2
[Bridge]
A# D D# F
I've got a message from the other side
A# D D#
It came to me last night in semaphore
F G
But I can't play the minor chords
[Verse 3]
C G C G
No rock'n'roll record made no difference to me
Em D F
No seven inch, twelve inch, cassette, A#D
C G C G
Not wasting my time on a dumb pop song
Em D F
Cut my hair going back to my bank job
11. Sinatra Theory
[Verse 1]
C Am
I walk these corridors
C Am
Don't think I'm ever coming home
C Am
One time to be your friend
C Am
I killed off everything you owned
Dm C Am
Losing the money was the hardest thing to own
[Chorus]
C Am
I'm coming home
[Verse 2]
C Am
I had some money once
C Am
I hear I spent it all on you
C Am
One time your Christmas lights
C Am
I threw my body on the lawn
Dm C Am
I'm smashing bugs with a ping-pong bat at home
[Chorus]
C Am
I'm coming home
C Am
My skeleton falls down
C Am
I'm coming home
[Bridge]
Ab D#
Community radio station rock gets played in the parking lots
A# Fm
These speakers amplify the tones
[Chorus]
C Am
I'm coming home
C Am
My skeleton falls down
C Am C
I walk these corridors
12. Schtum
[Verse 1]
D#
I'm remaining schtum
I'm not going to speak out any more
Fm D#
I'm gonna be quiet, so quiet
Fm Cm
Almost silent like the flow
[Verse 2]
D#
Now that you are missing
I've called the searching off
Fm
I'll blame it on the light
D#
And I'm so tired
Fm Cm
We'll resume it at dawn
[Chorus]
Fm Abm
Floating in the water
Ab D#
The floor is far below
[Verse 3]
Fm
I'm heading for Japan
D#
If I don't get snagged first
Fm Cm
As the water overflows
[Break]
D# Fm D# Fm Cm
Whistling bit
[Chorus]
Fm Abm
Floating in the water
Ab D#
The floor is far below
[verse 4]
Fm
I'm heading for Japan
D#
If I don't get snagged first
Fm Cm D#
As the water overflows
13. The Truth About Drugs
[Verse 1]
A# F
All the junkies are piling in their cars
C Cm
And the kids can stay home from school
A# F
Got the fire sticks, got the guns
D# F D#
We got some CDs and and some tapes to tape them on
[Chorus]
A# F D#
Seems the bitumen was made for me (made for me)
A# F D#
And the lines in the middle too (middle too)
A# F
Gnd they was travelling from A to A (G to B)
Gm F A#
And I love only you
[Verse 2]
A# F A# F
We gotta stop at a chemist I know
D# F Dm Gm
And that's the last of the car lighter
A# F A# F
I got a headache and my headache won't go
D# F D Ab
Were only eating places truck drivers go
[Chorus]
A# F D#
Seems the bitumen was made for me (made for me)
A# F D#
And the lines in the middle too (middle too)
A# F
Gnd they was travelling from A to A (G to B)
Gm F A#
And I love only you
[Outro]
A# F Gm F
This is called the truth about drugs
A# F Gm F
(This is called the truth about drugs)
A# F Gm F
This is called the truth about drugs
A# F Gm F D#
(This is called the truth about drugs)
14. Music Is Crap
[Verse 1]
A# F D# A#
Red eyes blue gaze, you look like hell today
F D# A#
Step out on parade, you do it so well
F D# A#
Your favourite shirt, those shoes that you bought in Perth
F D# A#
Dumb Hair smart slacks, that's rock apparel
[Chorus]
D#
(Ahhhhhh)
A# D# A# D#
Music is crap aliens told me so
A# D# A# D#
Better than that, were gonna let you know
A# D# A# D#
Just listen up, become a receiver
A# D# F
And then space out, when you're a believer
D#
That's what religion's for
A# D# A# D#
Music is crap
[Verse 2]
A# F D# A#
Think of your friends, then put one on the door
F D# A#
Everythings free, but were still poor
D# A#
Don't matter what you like, aliens hate it
D# F
Rock, pop, metal, shop, they just berate it
D#
And I've found
F D#
They dig the silence, hate the sound
F D#
So pick up your telescopes, put your guitars down
F
That's what I've found..
[Chorus]
A# D# A# D#
Music is crap aliens told me so
A# D# A# D#
Better than that, were gonna let you know
A# D# A# D#
Just listen up, become a receiver
A# D# F
And then space out, when you're a believer
D#
That's what religion's for
A# D# A# D#
Music is crap
A# D# A# D#
Music is crap
A# D# A# D#
Music is crap
A# D# A# D#
Music is crap
15. The Drum
[Verse 1]
C G C G
After the show yeah we have to go
B E
You don't like it, I don't like it
C G C G
Write me a note about all of the folks
B E G
You have lied to, and you've sold to
[Chorus]
A A# F
Has anybody seen my guitar and case
B F#
'Cos it seems out of place
D A B
Won't you be so kind to find it?
A# F
I had my amp there as well
B F#
But I think that it fell
D A B
Left to the stage right behind it
We won't find it
[Verse 2]
C G C G
Just like the blow that went right to your head
B E
You don't show it. You don't show it
C G C G
Now off to the station we had to go
B F#
You don't like it, no you don't like it
[Chorus]
A A# F
Has anybody seen my guitar and case
B F#
'Cos it seems out of place
D A B
Won't you be so kind to find it?
A# F
I had my amp there as well
B F#
But I think that it fell
D A B
Left to the stage right behind it
B
We won't find it
B
I don't like it
[Bridge]
E F
Guitar and case, yeah!
A C E
(Woah!)
F
Not in its place, yaaargh!
A C E
(Woah!)
F
My amp's there as well!
A C E
(Woah!)
F
I think that it fell, yeah, yeah!
A C
(Woah!)
[Verse 3]
C G C G
After the show yeah we have to go
B E
You don't like it, I don't like it
C G C G
Write me a note about all of the folks
B E G
You have lied to, and you've sold to
[Chorus]
A A# F
Has anybody seen my guitar and case
B F#
'Cos it seems out of place
D A B
Won't you be so kind to find it?
A# F
I had my amp there as well
B F#
But I think that it fell
D A B
Left to the stage right behind it
B
We won't find it
B
No you don't like it, like it, like it
[Outro]
E F
Guitar and case, yeah!
A C E
(Woah!)
F
Not in its place, yaaargh!
A C E
(Woah!)
F
My amp's there as well!
A C E
(Woah!)
F
I think that it fell, yeah, yeah!
A C
(Woah!)
A G
Off the stage, yeah
A C
Off the stage, yeah
A G
Off the stage, yeah
A E
16. Eight Years Of Rock And Roll Has Completley Destroyed My Memory
[Verse 1]
G D Em C
I've got no memories
Bm G
Oooh that's what I need
D Em C
I've got no past or yesterdays
Bm Am
Memories is what I need
Bm G D C D
But these memories are made for speed
[Verse 2]
G D Em C
I've forgot this morning
Bm G
Forgot this evening too
D Em C
I'll have to beg your pardon
Bm Am
Your name starts with a Q
Bm G D C
Oh no it's something I've missed
D G C G
My memory's missed
[Bridge]
C G F
I understand about your tan
C G F
So let me sleep tonight
C
If there's a song in my throat
G F
Guess it's something I ate
C G F
I guess must be throwing up
A# Gm
So kiss me
A# Gm
And make me believe
A# Gm
In ideologies
A# Gm
And the streets of sesame
G
Oh oh oh oh oh oh oh wah!
Cm Gm Am F Em C
[Verse 3]
G D Em C
I've got a good idea
Bm G
To write my memories down
D Em C
Then I'll have nothing to fear
Bm Am
When mine lets me down
Bm B
I'll find names and addresses on paper on the ground
C G
I'm good with faces, no good with names