Intro
A C E C#m
[Verse 1]
A C E
I'm totally confused
C#m
By you
A C E
I'm totally confused
C#m
By you
A C E
Theres a ten foot man
C#m
Making my lunch
A C E
I'll never understand
C#m B
I want you so much
[Chorus]
A E D#
And I never, ever want it
A E D#
And I never, ever want it
A E D#
And I never, ever want it
A E D#
And I never, ever want it
A C E C#m
[Verse 2]
A C E
I'm totally confused
C#m
By you
A C E
I'm totally confused
C#m
By you
A C E
Whisper in my face
C#m
Scream in my ear
A C E
Pack me in a suitcase
C#m
With the can of beer
[Chorus]
A E D#
And I never, ever want it
A E D#
And I never, ever want it
A E D#
And I never, ever want it
A E D#
And I never, ever want it
A C E C#m
6. Piece Of Shit
[Intro]
B C#m F# B G#m C#m F# E x2
[Chorus]
B C#m
I called my baby a piece of shit
F# B
She hated it, I hated it
G#m C#m F# E
Funny thing is now we both feel fine
B C#m
She let go and I caught it
F# B
I hated it, She hated it
G#m C#m F# E B C#m
Hope it doesn't happen all the time
[Verse 1]
F# C#m
Ripping up the carpet tiles
F# C#m
Greeted by a lonely smile
F# E
And the foundations seemed so solid
C#m F#
By the roof was always leaking, woo-hoo-hoo!
B C#m F# B G#m C#m F# E x2
[Verse 2]
B C#m
If you call my name I'll come strolling
F# B
Because I've fallen in the flame
C#m
If you think I'm all that you want
F# B C#m F#
The restaurant is booked in your name
[Chorus]
B C#m
I called my baby a piece of shit
F# B
She hated it, I hated it
G#m C#m F# E
Funny thing is now we both feel fine
B C#m
She let go and I caught it
F# B
I hated it, She hated it
G#m C#m F# E B C#m B
Hope it doesn't happen all the time
7. Pinball Lez
[Intro]
F# A
C# Fm Cm F#
C# Fm Cm F# C#
[Verse 1]
Fm Cm
Pinball Lez is shacked up
F# C# G# C#
With Nan's girlfriend
Fm Cm
Reconditioning pinballs
F# C#
He farms them out again
[Verse 2]
Fm Cm
The word on the street is suggesting
F# C# G# C#
Things aren't so great
Fm Cm
At the St. Lucia residence
F# C#
Things are pretty quiet at night
[Chorus]
F#
And no-one seems to be
A C#
Answering the phone
F# G#
Oh Lez come home (Leslie!)
C#
The pinballs need you
F# G#
Oh Lez come home (Leslie!)
C#
I promise the school-kids won't tease you
F# G#
Oh Lez come home (Leslie!)
C#
The cops will understand everything
F# G#
Oh Lez come home (Leslie!)
B Cm C# Fm Cm F# C#
The casinos are rigged to beat you
Fm Cm F# C#
[Verse 3]
Fm Cm
Lez has given up
F# C#
He's moving out to Stanthorpe
Fm Cm
Swidden agriculture
F# C#
Things are pretty quiet at night
[Chorus]
F# A F#
Out in the fields today
A
No-one seems to be
C#
Answering the phone
F# G#
Oh Lez come home (Leslie!)
C#
The pinballs need you
F# G#
Oh Lez come home (Leslie!)
C#
I promise the school-kids won't tease you
F# G#
Oh Lez come home (Leslie!)
C#
The cops will understand everything
F# G#
Oh Lez come home (Leslie!)
B Cm C# Fm Cm F# C#
The casinos are rigged to beat you
8. Sons And Daughters
[Verse 1]
E B D A
If I could read their writing I would let you know
E B D A
All about their records and the places they go
B D A C#m
I don't get it but I see it in the sun
D A E B F#
And the aerosols they use are never captured by security
[Verse 2]
E B D A
Cameras talking and the lenses are walking
E B D A
All of it's funky just to let me know
[Chorus]
B
I don't get it (I don't get it)
D
But I get it (I don't get it)
A C#
From the sons and daughters
D A E B F#
We spent all of our money on groceries from Seessel's
[Bridge]
G D G
I fell asleep in the morning light
D G
I fell asleep in the very first light
D G
And as the day had just begun
Em G D
With you lying in the sun
G D G
Lying in the very last sun
G D G
Lying in the sun
D G
Lying in the very last sun
[Verse 3]
E B D A
If I could read their writing I would let you know
E B D A
Progress from colouring to outlining to piecing on their own
B D A C#
I like you because you are just the right height
E D
If I could read their writing I would let you know
9. Nice Bird
[Intro]
A C# C
A C# C
[Verse 1]
A C# C
I've got a nice bird
A C# C
I've got a nice bird
Bm F#m Bm F#m
I understand that a bird in my hand
D C#
Is worth two in the bush
Bm F#m Bm F#m D
Understand that the bird is the word that I use
C# C
To describe you
[Chorus]
A C# C
I've got a nice bird
A C# C
I've got a nice bird
A C# C
I've got a nice bird
[Verse 2]
Bm F#m Bm F#m
This world divides into people who think
D C#
There are two kinds of folks and those who don't
Bm F#m Bm F#m
Trey's got the feathers and a 12-gauge shotgun
D C# A G X 2
Volkswagens from the Reich!
[Chorus]
A C# C
I've got a nice bird
A C# C
I've got a nice bird
[Bridge]
Em A D
There's a stretch of road out past The Gap
G C
Where they're taking some snaps, stick to the music champ
The words are important
F#7 A G X 4
The words are important!
[Chorus]
A C#m C
I've got a nice bird
A C#m C
I've got a nice bird X 5
[Outro]
B B
N.I.C.E.B.I.R.D. bird
10. No Rock And Roll Record
[Verse 1]
E B E B
No rock'n'roll singer is going to sing my song
G#m F# A
Same stupid words going over and over
E B E B
The drop-out turned out trashing my sound
G#m F# A
Rub the lines off the back of my hands
[Chorus]
B
I cut my teeth on the end of my bed
F#
I never ever sang in a high school band
B F# G#m
Somehow you would think I would have figured it out by now
A
By now
[Verse 2]
E B E B
No rock'n'roll record made no difference to me
G#m F# A
No seven inch, twelve inch, cassette, DD
E B E B
Not wasting my time on a dumb pop song
G#m F# A
Cut my hair going back to my bank job
[Chorus]
B
The radio could have been kinder to me
F#
But I never looked good on a colour TV
B F# G#m
Somehow you would think I would have figured it out by now
A
By now
E B E B G#m F# A x2
[Bridge]
D F# G A
I've got a message from the other side
D F# G
It came to me last night in semaphore
A B
But I can't play the minor chords
[Verse 3]
E B E B
No rock'n'roll record made no difference to me
G#m F# A
No seven inch, twelve inch, cassette, DD
E B E B
Not wasting my time on a dumb pop song
G#m F# A
Cut my hair going back to my bank job
11. Sinatra Theory
[Verse 1]
E C#m
I walk these corridors
E C#m
Don't think I'm ever coming home
E C#m
One time to be your friend
E C#m
I killed off everything you owned
F#m E C#m
Losing the money was the hardest thing to own
[Chorus]
E C#m
I'm coming home
[Verse 2]
E C#m
I had some money once
E C#m
I hear I spent it all on you
E C#m
One time your Christmas lights
E C#m
I threw my body on the lawn
F#m E C#m
I'm smashing bugs with a ping-pong bat at home
[Chorus]
E C#m
I'm coming home
E C#m
My skeleton falls down
E C#m
I'm coming home
[Bridge]
C G
Community radio station rock gets played in the parking lots
D Am
These speakers amplify the tones
[Chorus]
E C#m
I'm coming home
E C#m
My skeleton falls down
E C#m E
I walk these corridors
12. Schtum
[Verse 1]
G
I'm remaining schtum
I'm not going to speak out any more
Am G
I'm gonna be quiet, so quiet
Am Em
Almost silent like the flow
[Verse 2]
G
Now that you are missing
I've called the searching off
Am
I'll blame it on the light
G
And I'm so tired
Am Em
We'll resume it at dawn
[Chorus]
Am Cm
Floating in the water
C G
The floor is far below
[Verse 3]
Am
I'm heading for Japan
G
If I don't get snagged first
Am Em
As the water overflows
[Break]
G Am G Am Em
Whistling bit
[Chorus]
Am Cm
Floating in the water
C G
The floor is far below
[verse 4]
Am
I'm heading for Japan
G
If I don't get snagged first
Am Em G
As the water overflows
13. The Truth About Drugs
[Verse 1]
D A
All the junkies are piling in their cars
E Em
And the kids can stay home from school
D A
Got the fire sticks, got the guns
G A G
We got some CDs and and some tapes to tape them on
[Chorus]
D A G
Seems the bitumen was made for me (made for me)
D A G
And the lines in the middle too (middle too)
D A
Bnd they was travelling from A to C# (B to B)
Bm A D
And I love only you
[Verse 2]
D A D A
We gotta stop at a chemist I know
G A F#m Bm
And that's the last of the car lighter
D A D A
I got a headache and my headache won't go
G A F# C
Were only eating places truck drivers go
[Chorus]
D A G
Seems the bitumen was made for me (made for me)
D A G
And the lines in the middle too (middle too)
D A
Bnd they was travelling from A to C# (B to B)
Bm A D
And I love only you
[Outro]
D A Bm A
This is called the truth about drugs
D A Bm A
(This is called the truth about drugs)
D A Bm A
This is called the truth about drugs
D A Bm A G
(This is called the truth about drugs)
14. Music Is Crap
[Verse 1]
D A G D
Red eyes blue gaze, you look like hell today
A G D
Step out on parade, you do it so well
A G D
Your favourite shirt, those shoes that you bought in Perth
A G D
Dumb Hair smart slacks, that's rock apparel
[Chorus]
G
(Ahhhhhh)
D G D G
Music is crap aliens told me so
D G D G
Better than that, were gonna let you know
D G D G
Just listen up, become a receiver
D G A
And then space out, when you're a believer
G
That's what religion's for
D G D G
Music is crap
[Verse 2]
D A G D
Think of your friends, then put one on the door
A G D
Everythings free, but were still poor
G D
Don't matter what you like, aliens hate it
G A
Rock, pop, metal, shop, they just berate it
G
And I've found
A G
They dig the silence, hate the sound
A G
So pick up your telescopes, put your guitars down
A
That's what I've found..
[Chorus]
D G D G
Music is crap aliens told me so
D G D G
Better than that, were gonna let you know
D G D G
Just listen up, become a receiver
D G A
And then space out, when you're a believer
G
That's what religion's for
D G D G
Music is crap
D G D G
Music is crap
D G D G
Music is crap
D G D G
Music is crap
15. The Drum
[Verse 1]
E B E B
After the show yeah we have to go
D# G#
You don't like it, I don't like it
E B E B
Write me a note about all of the folks
D# G# B
You have lied to, and you've sold to
[Chorus]
C# D A
Has anybody seen my guitar and case
D# A#
'Cos it seems out of place
F# C# D#
Won't you be so kind to find it?
D A
I had my amp there as well
D# A#
But I think that it fell
F# C# D#
Left to the stage right behind it
We won't find it
[Verse 2]
E B E B
Just like the blow that went right to your head
D# G#
You don't show it. You don't show it
E B E B
Now off to the station we had to go
D# A#
You don't like it, no you don't like it
[Chorus]
C# D A
Has anybody seen my guitar and case
D# A#
'Cos it seems out of place
F# C# D#
Won't you be so kind to find it?
D A
I had my amp there as well
D# A#
But I think that it fell
F# C# D#
Left to the stage right behind it
D#
We won't find it
D#
I don't like it
[Bridge]
G# A
Guitar and case, yeah!
C# E G#
(Woah!)
A
Not in its place, yaaargh!
C# E G#
(Woah!)
A
My amp's there as well!
C# E G#
(Woah!)
A
I think that it fell, yeah, yeah!
C# E
(Woah!)
[Verse 3]
E B E B
After the show yeah we have to go
D# G#
You don't like it, I don't like it
E B E B
Write me a note about all of the folks
D# G# B
You have lied to, and you've sold to
[Chorus]
C# D A
Has anybody seen my guitar and case
D# A#
'Cos it seems out of place
F# C# D#
Won't you be so kind to find it?
D A
I had my amp there as well
D# A#
But I think that it fell
F# C# D#
Left to the stage right behind it
D#
We won't find it
D#
No you don't like it, like it, like it
[Outro]
G# A
Guitar and case, yeah!
C# E G#
(Woah!)
A
Not in its place, yaaargh!
C# E G#
(Woah!)
A
My amp's there as well!
C# E G#
(Woah!)
A
I think that it fell, yeah, yeah!
C# E
(Woah!)
C# B
Off the stage, yeah
C# E
Off the stage, yeah
C# B
Off the stage, yeah
C# G#
16. Eight Years Of Rock And Roll Has Completley Destroyed My Memory
[Verse 1]
B F# G#m E
I've got no memories
D#m B
Oooh that's what I need
F# G#m E
I've got no past or yesterdays
D#m C#m
Memories is what I need
D#m B F# E F#
But these memories are made for speed
[Verse 2]
B F# G#m E
I've forgot this morning
D#m B
Forgot this evening too
F# G#m E
I'll have to beg your pardon
D#m C#m
Your name starts with a Q
D#m B F# E
Oh no it's something I've missed
F# B E B
My memory's missed
[Bridge]
E B A
I understand about your tan
E B A
So let me sleep tonight
E
If there's a song in my throat
B A
Guess it's something I ate
E B A
I guess must be throwing up
D Bm
So kiss me
D Bm
And make me believe
D Bm
In ideologies
D Bm
And the streets of sesame
B
Oh oh oh oh oh oh oh wah!
Em Bm C#m A G#m E
[Verse 3]
B F# G#m E
I've got a good idea
D#m B
To write my memories down
F# G#m E
Then I'll have nothing to fear
D#m C#m
When mine lets me down
D#m D#
I'll find names and addresses on paper on the ground
E B
I'm good with faces, no good with names
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