Verse
Fm G#
I want to brush my hair some more
D# C#
But I’m scared it might fall out
Fm G#
I want to paint my face again
D# C#
But I’m scared that they might shout
Fm G#
I dream of being pretty
D# C#
More than I do of thriving
Fm G#
And dream of being remembered
D# C#
More than I do surviving
Fm G#
I cross and cross and cross these trails
D# C#
And cross re-cross old paths
Fm G#
Retread through all the footsteps
D# C#
Where once we were so sad
Fm G#
It’s nice to revisit
D# C#
It's nice to replant
Fm G#
But do I garden my trauma
D# C# Fm G# D# C#
Like the spineless sycophant
Fm G#
In busy rooms all there for me
D# C#
I still feel misunderstood
Fm
But it’s ungrateful brain
G# D# C#
And chosen pain, to say I feel unloved
Fm
I might be often drama king
G# D# C#
I may mope and pout and grumble
Fm G#
Even in improving circumstance
D# C#
I still find myself disgruntled
Fm G#
I dig and dig, dig out my brain
D# C#
With primordial soup spoon
Fm G# D# C#
Phantasmagoric memories are slowly detuned
Fm G# D# C#
And endlessly I rewrite all my histories of you
Fm G# D# C#
Unstable causality, breathes into tapestries untrue
Fm G# D# C#
And soon unsure the guilt I feel just comes from my disposition
Fm G# D# C#
If these proppian dichotomies are just my own rendition
Fm G# D# C#
Some days I feel the hero, other days I feel the villain
Fm G# D# C# F G# D# C#
Perhaps we both are mutually instigator and the victim
Fm
I want to think so fickle
F D# C#
And live just aesthetic life
Fm
Because this self-analysis
D# C#
It cuts through me like a knife
Fm G#
It slices so mathematically
D# C#
Into these perfect halves
Fm G#m
And the binary of thinking
D# C#
Can tear my head apart