Intro
G#, C
Fm, C
G C
Such was the expression of the child
Em
As he bounced across my windscreen
C
And off the other side.
G
That I got the strong impression
C Em
For a second that he wasn't so much angry
C
As incredibly surprised.
C D
As I watched him in my rear view mirror slowly slip away,
C D
I turned to my instructor and I felt I had to say,
G B C
Do you think we should reschedule the test?
G B C
'Cause I'm starting now to think it might be best.
Em
Either way, I'm pretty sure
C
You could have taught me clutch control
D G
In a playground that was emptier than this.
G#, C
Fm, C
G C
Such was the blind panic of the boy scouts
Em
As I backed into the duck pond
C
In the middle of the green.
G
That it became a little clearer
C Em
Why the mirror said that objects featured in it
C
Might be closer than they seem.
C D
As I watched the displaced goldfish flapping vainly on the grass
C D
I smiled at the policeman and I felt I had to ask,
G B C
Would a fifty maybe make this go away?
G B C
'Cause I really don't have time for this today.
Em
Besides which how am I supposed to learn to drive
C
When everywhere I turn there's
D G
Five or six small children getting in the way.
Em
C
I would later learn that was the moment
A Em
The SWAT team was mobilised
C
And that the car chase that followed
A Em
Was globally televised.
In fact I'm told that they
C A Em
Still use the footage for police training video
C
And though I've not seen it personally
A G
I've learned that it basically shows
(From here to the end just repeat the intro pattern G#, C#, Fm, C#)
C Em
Me and my instructor tearing down the autobahn
C G
Doing ninety in a Mazda with the handbrake on
C Em
Ploughing recklessly through traffic, cones and trees.
C G
I am Thelma to his terrified Louise
C Em
And all the while I got him screaming in my head
C G
That I should probably change up out of second gear,
C Em
Check my mirrors, keep my hands at two and ten
C G
And maybe give some thought to turning myself in.
But in spite of everything,
C Em
We made it to the border
C
Though the last two miles was in reverse
G
Up the hard shoulder.
That old car was dead,
C Em
But somehow we'd survived.
We climbed out of the wreck
C G
And solemnly high-fived.
So that's how me and my instructor
Moved to Switzerland.
Opened up a little cafe
In the hinterland.
And though I never got my licence, in the end,
I found something so much better
G# brand new, bestest friend.
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