G#m
Step right up
Fb
We bring to you the finest entertainment
D#7
And I am pleased to be your humble servant
G#m D#7
Accept our hospitality, indulge in abnormality
G#m
Step right up
Fb
We've something here for everyone's enjoyment
D#7
I do this as a gift, not for employment
G#m D#7
D# portrait of insanity, approached with pure humanity
G# D#
Come see our girls, crazy girls
G#/C G#7 D#
If you're willing to be thrilled, this is a hell of a ride
A#m F5
Those girls, crazy girls
G# D#7 G#7
They're hot, they're nuts, they're suicidal
G# D#
Tickets cheap, it's a crime
G#/C G#7 D#
And they're half price after 4 o' clock, so toss us a dime
A#m D#7 G#
To see these lovely freaks of nature for a limited time
A#m D#7 G#
Come see the girls, girls, girls
G# A#7
Some of them are really quite attractive as you see
D#7 G#
Some are truly hideous, I'm sure that you'll agree
A#m D#7 G#
While others still look rather quite a lot like you and me
A# D#7
But you mustn't let them fool you, just one more rule
G# A#7
You shouldn't look this one too long in the eye
D#7 G#
And that one, let's just keep walking by
A#m D#7 G#
These ain't no ordinary girls, and we've a steady supply
A#m D#7 G#
Grab another cup of tea, and follow me
G# D#
To see our girls, crazy girls
G#/C G#7 D#
If you're willing to be thrilled, this is a hell of a ride
A#m F5
Those girls, crazy girls
G# D#7 G#7
They're hot, they're nuts, they're suicidal
G# D#
Tickets cheap, it's a crime
G#/C G#7 D#
And they're half price after 4 o' clock, so toss us a dime
A#m D#7 G#
To see these lovely freaks of nature for a limited time
A#m D#7 G#
Come see the girls, girls, girls
G# A#7
Now, has anybody any clever questions for your guide
A# D#7 G#7
For a penny more, go on and ask, we have nothing here to hide.
Quiet down! You, sir?
G# A#7
If insanity's primarily a femininish malady,
D#7 G#
And no one's doubting that for it's a scientific fact,
A#m D#7 G#
Then according to the medics, are they faultier genetics?
A# D#7
Are they born with this disease, or is it something they contract?
G# A#7
It’s all to do with reproductive organs
D#7 G#
Which are naturally unstable in a dame
A#m D#7 G#
You see, from lunar we have lunacy and lunatic and loony
A# D#7
And they're always ovulating by the cycle of the moony
G#
I have a question (shoot!)
A#7
Has any patient ever been released
D#7 G#
Would you send her home if her bizarre behavior would decrease?
A#m D#7 G#
For the good of our society, they oughtn't reproduce
A# D#7
So while they may pretend propriety, we'll never let them loose
G# D#
Come see the girls, crazy girls
G#/C G#7 D#
If you're willing to be thrilled, this is a hell of a ride
A#m F5
Those girls, crazy girls
G# D#7 G#7
They're hot, they're nuts, they're suicidal
G# D#
Tickets cheap, it's a crime
G#/C G#7 D#
And they're half price after 4 o' clock, so toss us a dime
A#m D#7 G#
To see these lovely freaks of nature for a limited time
A#m D#7 G#
Come see the girls, girls, girls
Some are born mad
Some achieve madness
Some have madness thrust upon them
This is the real thing my friends, 100 percent, authentic, mentally-ill
Except no imitations
For a little extra on the side, you can arrange
For a slightly more intimate encounter, wink wink
For a tuppence, just a tuppence, a handful of pills to feed the inmates
We've got pills for depression, obsession, agression, possession, indiscretion,
But there's a bloody pill for everything nowadays
D#
How big is a lady's brain?
A#m A#7 G#7
It's really very, very small, a simple thought is quite a strain
A#m
This seems just a bit inhumane
A# A#7 G#7
It's just a simple little shock, it doesn't cause her any pain
G# A#7
They're really more like animals than people
D#7 G#
Which, as we've proven, haven't any souls at all.
A#m D#7 G#
The only bits that aren't inferior are bosom and posterior
A# D#7
And these are only useful in a seedy music hall
G# A#7
They don't bite, well they might
D#7 G#
I say this one does look hungry tonight
A#m D#7
So get your picture with an inmate
G#
But be sure she's locked up tight
A#
They're practically wild sir
D#7
Protect your child sir
G# A#7
They don't recall the taste of freedom
D#7 G#
They're just happy if we feed them
A#m D#7
So point and laugh, it isn't bad
G#
They oughtn't mind because they're mad!
A# D#7
If you haven't got a dime, toss us your pearls
You're welcome to enjoy
G# D#
Our girls, crazy girls
G#/C G#7 D#
If you're willing to be thrilled, this is a hell of a ride
A#m F5
Those girls, crazy girls
G# D#7 G#7
They're hot, they're nuts, they're suicidal
G# D#
Tickets cheap, it's a crime
G#/C G#7 D#
And they're half price after 4 o' clock, so toss us a dime
A#m D#7 G#
To see these lovely freaks of nature for a limited time
A#m D#7 G#
Come see the girls, girls, girls
A#m D#7 G#
I've got a lot more words to say, but I just can't make them rhyme
A#m D#7 G#
So ladies, let this be a lesson to you, keep your hair uncut
A#m D#7
Your corsets tight, your morals high
G#
Your knitting neat, your yappers shut
A#m D#7
This is what comes of over-educating,
G# A#m
mentally over-stimulating,
D#7
too much serious conversating,
G# A#m
organized religion-hating,
D#7
sinful over-copulating,
G# A#m
marriage without procreating,
D#7
girl-on-girl caught lesbiating,
G# A#m
she was caught while masturbating,
D#7
they all mind manipulating,
G# A#m
chronically hallucinating,
D#7
certainly there's no debating,
G# A#m
some we just find fascinating,
D#7
women's rights facilitating,
G# A#m
independent thought creating,
D#7
she just may be complicating,
G# G#7
get your money out, we're waiting
To see those
A#m
Girls!
D#7
Girls!
G#
Girls!
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