Verse
Em G Gmaj9/F# Em
I went up for my interview on the fourth day of July
Em G Gmaj9/F# Em
Personnel man he questioned me until I nearly cried
Em G Gmaj9/F# Em
He made me fill in forms until I shook with fear
Am* G Gmaj9/F# Em
About the colour of my toilet roll and if my cousin is queer
[Chorus]
Em G Gmaj9/F# Em
Here's your goldwatch and the shackles for your chain
Em G Gmaj9/F# Em
And your piece of paper to say you left here sane
Em G Gmaj9/F# Em
And if you've a son who wants a good career
Am* G Gmaj9/F# Em
Just get him to sign on the dotted line and work for fifty years
[Verse 2]
Em G Gmaj9/F# Em
He asked me how many jobs I'd had before
Em G Gmaj9/F# Em
He nearly had a heart attack when I answered, four
Em G Gmaj9/F# Em
Four jobs in twenty years, oh, this can never be
Am* G Gmaj9/F# Em
We only take on men who work until they die
[Chorus]
Em G Gmaj9/F# Em
Here's your goldwatch and the shackles for your chain
Em G Gmaj9/F# Em
And your piece of paper to say you left here sane
Em G Gmaj9/F# Em
And if you've a son who wants a good career
Am* G Gmaj9/F# Em
Just get him to sign on the dotted line and work for fifty years
[Verse 3]
Em G Gmaj9/F# Em
He took me outside to where the gravestones stand in line
Em G Gmaj9/F# Em
This is where we bury them in quick-stone and in lime
Em G Gmaj9/F# Em
And if you come to work for us on this you must agree
Am* G Gmaj9/F# Em
That if you're going to die please do it during tea-break
[Chorus]
Em G Gmaj9/F# Em
Here's your goldwatch and the shackles for your chain
Em G Gmaj9/F# Em
And your piece of paper to say you left here sane
Em G Gmaj9/F# Em
And if you've a son who wants a good career
Am* G Gmaj9/F# Em
Just get him to sign on the dotted line and work for fifty years
[Verse 4]
Em G Gmaj9/F# Em
This story that you heard you may think rather queer
Em G Gmaj9/F# Em
But it is the truth you'll be surprised to hear
Em G Gmaj9/F# Em
I did not want no job upon the board
Am* G Gmaj9/F# Em
I just wanted to take a broom and sweep the bloody floor
[Chorus]
Em G Gmaj9/F# Em
Here's your goldwatch and the shackles for your chain
Em G Gmaj9/F# Em
And your piece of paper to say you left here sane
Em G Gmaj9/F# Em
And if you've a son who wants a good career
Am* G Gmaj9/F# Em
Just get him to sign on the dotted line and work for fifty years
[Outro]
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