Verse
Gm A# A#maj9/A Gm
I went up for my interview on the fourth day of July
Gm A# A#maj9/A Gm
Personnel man he questioned me until I nearly cried
Gm A# A#maj9/A Gm
He made me fill in forms until I shook with fear
Am* A# A#maj9/A Gm
About the colour of my toilet roll and if my cousin is queer
[Chorus]
Gm A# A#maj9/A Gm
Here's your goldwatch and the shackles for your chain
Gm A# A#maj9/A Gm
And your piece of paper to say you left here sane
Gm A# A#maj9/A Gm
And if you've a son who wants a good career
Am* A# A#maj9/A Gm
Just get him to sign on the dotted line and work for fifty years
[Verse 2]
Gm A# A#maj9/A Gm
He asked me how many jobs I'd had before
Gm A# A#maj9/A Gm
He nearly had a heart attack when I answered, four
Gm A# A#maj9/A Gm
Four jobs in twenty years, oh, this can never be
Am* A# A#maj9/A Gm
We only take on men who work until they die
[Chorus]
Gm A# A#maj9/A Gm
Here's your goldwatch and the shackles for your chain
Gm A# A#maj9/A Gm
And your piece of paper to say you left here sane
Gm A# A#maj9/A Gm
And if you've a son who wants a good career
Am* A# A#maj9/A Gm
Just get him to sign on the dotted line and work for fifty years
[Verse 3]
Gm A# A#maj9/A Gm
He took me outside to where the gravestones stand in line
Gm A# A#maj9/A Gm
This is where we bury them in quick-stone and in lime
Gm A# A#maj9/A Gm
And if you come to work for us on this you must agree
Am* A# A#maj9/A Gm
That if you're going to die please do it during tea-break
[Chorus]
Gm A# A#maj9/A Gm
Here's your goldwatch and the shackles for your chain
Gm A# A#maj9/A Gm
And your piece of paper to say you left here sane
Gm A# A#maj9/A Gm
And if you've a son who wants a good career
Am* A# A#maj9/A Gm
Just get him to sign on the dotted line and work for fifty years
[Verse 4]
Gm A# A#maj9/A Gm
This story that you heard you may think rather queer
Gm A# A#maj9/A Gm
But it is the truth you'll be surprised to hear
Gm A# A#maj9/A Gm
I did not want no job upon the board
Am* A# A#maj9/A Gm
I just wanted to take a broom and sweep the bloody floor
[Chorus]
Gm A# A#maj9/A Gm
Here's your goldwatch and the shackles for your chain
Gm A# A#maj9/A Gm
And your piece of paper to say you left here sane
Gm A# A#maj9/A Gm
And if you've a son who wants a good career
Am* A# A#maj9/A Gm
Just get him to sign on the dotted line and work for fifty years
[Outro]
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