Intro
D#m C# D#m C# D#m C# D#m C#
[Verse 1]
D#m F#
Shakespeare’s got a mail order Uzi
G#m A# D#m
Shakespeare’s got a gun; he’s gonna use it
D#m F#
Shakespeare’s got a prostitute names Suzie
G#m A# D#m
Shakespeare’s got a gun; he’s gonna use it
F# G#m
It seems some monkey just outside of Pittsburgh
B A#
Finally typed out Hamlet; typed out Hamlet word for word
D#m F# G#m B
Shakespeare’s pissed off; Shakespeare’s got an Uzi
G#m A# D#m
Shakespeare’s got a gun; he’s gonna use it
[Interlude]
D#m C# D#m C# D#m C#
[Verse 2]
D#m F#
Shakespeare’s got a Fender Stratocaster
G#m A# D#m
He’s got that sucker cranked; he’s gonna blast her
D#m F#
Led Zeppelin was never any faster
G#m A# D#m
Shakespeare’s got a Fender Stratocaster
F# G#m
He’s dressed in black; He’s got a Marshall stack
B A#
He dances with baboons who jump up on his back
D#m F# G#m B
Aww Love’s Labor’s Lost; that’s in the past
D#m
Shakespeare’s got a Fender Stratocaster
[Interlude]
D#m C# D#m C# D#m C#
[Bridge]
F# G#m
Shakespeare’s got no use for thick black glasses
B A#
Who sit and dissect tragedies in college English classes
F# G#m
Shakespeare’s sick of words; Shakespeare’s sick of letters
B A#
Shakespeare watches videos the dirtier the better
[Verse 3]
D#m F#
Shakespeare’s got a liquor store in Anaheim
G#m A# D#m
Shakespeare combs his hair with soup spoon
D#m F#
Shakespeare drinks tequila out of styrofoam
G#m A# D#m
Shakespeare’s got a liquor store in Anaheim
F# G#m
He sells magazines; he eats cigarettes
B A#
He never says a word; he sleeps in a Corvette
D#m F# G#m
Aww Shakespeare’s got a gun; Shakespeare’s got an Uzi
G#m B
Shakespeare’s got a guitar; says he’s gonna use it
D#m F# G#m
Shakespeare’s got a gun and liquor store in Anaheim
D#m A# D#m
Shakespeare’s got a gun; he’s gonna use it
[Outro]
D#m C# D#m C# D#m E