Intro
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[Verse 1]
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In 1792 in old London Town
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The Cornfoot's were a-starving as the snow lay on the ground
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And so in desperation Jimmy Cornfoot stole some bread
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But not just any bread, it were Hovis Best o' Both
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[Verse 2]
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Jimmy was arrested and dragged off to the court
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Not the one with tennis but the, you know, legal sort
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The judge roared "Transportation", Jimmy quivered in the stand
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"I'm sending you twelve thousand miles to Van Diemen's land"
[Pre-chorus]
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Then a year and a day afer Jimmy sailed away
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His brother Brian got a letter one cold winter's day
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And his heart began to warm as he opended it and read
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The words from his dear brother and this is what it said:
[Chorus]
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"Oh Australia! Oh Australia!
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It's the land of golden beaches, bright blue skies and crystal seas
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"Oh Australia! Oh Australia!
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If you just ignore the bushfires it's the place to be"
[Verse 3]
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Brian Cornfoot thought "You know, well that's the place for me,"
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So he stole a rich man's horse and crashed it straight into a tree
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The judge roared "Transportation", Brian smiled back from the stand
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"I'm sending you twelve thousand miles to Van Diemen's land"
[Pre-chorus]
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Then a year and a day afer Brian sailed away
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His sister Connie got a letter one cold winter's day
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And her heart began to warm as she opended it and read
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The words from her dear brother and this is what it said:
[Chorus]
B F# B F#
"Oh Australia! Oh Australia!
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It's the land of golden beaches, bright blue skies and crystal seas
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"Oh Australia! Oh Australia!
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If you just ignore the bushfires, deadly spiders, poisonous snakes it's the place to be"
[Verse 4]
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Connie Cornfoot thought "You know, well I want some o' that"
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So she punched a policeman in the face and peed into his hat
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The judge roared "Transportation", Connie sniggered in the stand
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"I'm sending you twelve thousand miles to Van Diemen's land"
[Pre-chorus]
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Then a year and a day afer Connie sailed away
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Mother Cornfoot got a letter one cold winter's day
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And her heart began to warm as she opended it and read
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The words from her dear daugher and this is what it said:
[Chorus]
B F# B F#
"Oh Australia! Oh Australia!
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It's the land of golden beaches, bright blue skies and crystal seas
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"Oh Australia! Oh Australia!
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If you just ignore the bushfires, deadly spiders, poisonous snakes
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vicious croccodiles and sting-rays it's the place to be"
[Verse 5]
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Gentle Mother Cornfoot thought "I need to join the kids"
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So she rang a neighbour's doorbell and then ran away and hid
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But found behind a lamppost she was dragged off to the stand
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Where the judge roared "Mother Cornfoot, for this crime you'll surely hang!"
[Verse 6]
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The hangman said "Today's the day you'll swing here in the breeze"
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Mother Cornfoot took a breath and sank down on her knees
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Her eyes fixed on the masses that had come to see her dead
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She raised her voice up to the skies and this is what she said:
[Chorus]
N.C.
"Oh Australia! Oh Australia!
N.C.
It's the land of golden beaches, bright blue skies and crystal seas
N.C.
"Oh Australia! Oh Australia!
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If you just ignore the bushfires, deadly spiders, poisonous snakes
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vicious crocodiles and sting-rays, lethal jellyfish and sharks,
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Dannii Minogue it's the place to be"
[Chorus]
B F# B F#
"Oh Australia! Oh Australia!
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It's the land of golden beaches, bright blue skies and crystal seas
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"Oh Australia! Oh Australia!
B F# C# F#
If you just ignore Australia it's the place to be"