Intro
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[Verse 1]
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Good folk of this nation, come pay great attention
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To the words that I mention and what I do say
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For if you will listen, I’ll tell of a villain
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Who over this country too long has held sway
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I’ll sing of McConnell, that dirty old scoundrel
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E thief, cad, and wastrel of highest degree
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E cheat and a coward who craves naught but power
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And works every hour against you and me
[Verse 2]
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This country’s great schism and bitter division
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Have come from McConnell’s great vision and plan
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His foul machinations have shut down the nation
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And brazenly stole the great court of our land
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The rules he has broken, and lies he has spoken
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He’s allied himself with a racist buffoon
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May every misfortune become Mitchell’s portion
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And plague him each day till he enters his tomb
[Vwerse 3]
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May his toast always burn, may his milk always turn
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May he step on a Lego each day when he wakes
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May his car be rear-ended, his license suspended
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May he find half a maggot next time he eats steak
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May his Facebook be hacked, may his passwords be cracked
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May his phone lock him out many thousands of times
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May his credit score dwindle from those who have swindled
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This miser who covets our nickels and dimes
[Verse 4]
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May his pants all be stained, his attorney arraigned
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May his pacemaker always be needing a charge
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May his dewlap be shriveled, his liver be riddled
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With polyps and cysts, may his prostate enlarge
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May the change he denies cause the rivers to rise
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And flood out his basement with sewage and slime
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So the spores of black mold may rise up and take hold
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Of his lungs as a payment for his awful crimes
[Verse 5]
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May his shoes never tie, may his ink never dry
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May the bag always break when he takes out the trash
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May he fall down the stairs, lose the rest of his hair
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May he play online poker and lose all his cash
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May his friends all forsake him, arthritis o’ertake him
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May he ne’er rest easy by day or by night
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May his insurance fail him when sicknesses ail him
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And leave him with nothing, alone in his plight
[Verse 6]
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Soon it will be November, and I bid you remember
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The seat of a Senator’s no guarantee
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Kentuckians all, we are counting on y’all
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To oust this smirking bastard and set us all free
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Our way will be harried, the manders are gerried
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So we mustn’t tarry or surely we’ll fail
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To make sure next year Mitchell, that son-of-a-bitch’ll
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Be out on the street, in disgrace, or in jail
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